winona16:

1. Completely relax your body and regulate your breathing.
2. Get on your hands and knees.
3. Feel the fire surge within you.
4. Allow an impressive amount of fire to escape your lips.
5. Congratulations, you are a dragon.
No one is going to ask you for blow jobs.

cherryblossomsparkle:

Cosmo sex tip #339 
When your partner just isn’t doing the trick, try telling him “Seriously, Christ will come before I do.” And see how he reacts.

ticklishaoba:

hot things to say during sex:

  • dang son
  • bless you
  • yabba dabba doo
  • your own name
  • heil hitler
  • radical
  • gnarly to the max!
  • how dare you
  • oh well
  • i’m sorry. i’m so so sorry
  • psych!

trust me these work 100% i had the sex once